I haven't felt like blogging as much lately because I don't know if I have as much to say. (Also I'm busy with my kids and I've been sick and my computer died too).
I do absolutely love my doula work. I had a birth this week with a client and it was just wonderful. I love being there for the entire labor, watching the rhythm and intensity build as the hours pass and then the culmination of a new person into the world is just amazing. Mothers are so powerful.
I am now officially a certified doula. CD(DONA). I don't have any more clients scheduled so now that I am official I want to get my name out more. I feel I am a good doula because I care deeply about the women I work with and I want to support them. I was reading in my journal the other day from when I was in L&D during nursing school. I wrote, "I feel like supporting women during birth is what I was meant to do". That was back in '02, before I even knew what a doula was!
But there is a part of me that feels inadequate. I feel like a failure myself because I have had two scheduled c-sections. I have never even been given the chance to labor. Sometimes I blame my doctors and midwives for that, sometimes I blame myself. I think I would be a better doula if I experience labor and birth myself. Other times I feel like my experiences make me a good doula. For instance, I know first hand that c-sections aren't as safe as vaginal births in most cases. I am passionate about helping others VBAC or avoid the first c-section. I know what it's like to have a baby in the NICU. I know what it's like to be a mother, is that enough to make me a good doula?
I care deeply about women and what happens during birth. It's very important. I know that because 16 months after my second c-section I still cry about it. Not very often, but writing this out is making me cry now. I wish I would have just had my VBAC. But then I probably wouldn't be on this path now of being a doula so in that aspect it's okay.
Well, that's enough of rambling for now. It feels good to get some of my feelings out.
Audrey's birth 08
James and Nathan 03
I would bet money that you are a fantastic doula. And I think your scheduled sections have made you very empathetic towards, and a strong advocate for, natural birth. And, should you choose to, I look forward to the day when I hear all about your VBA2C!
ReplyDeleteSo... how far do you travel for your doula services? :)
I love your blog, even though every time I read about your c-sections it makes me think about mine, and then I cry too. See? I am crying right now!
ReplyDeleteI loved hearing what you wrote in your journal so many years ago! How cool that you found the path to make it happen. I think knowing the alternative (c-section and other interventions) so well gives you great credibility in your plight to provide women with what you feel is a better option. You are a mother. You are a strong woman. All these things have made you a fantastic doula!
In what ways do doulas usually market themselves? I can't wait to hear about more clients. This is so exciting!
You can look back everyday...but you can never undo what's in the past. Next time, you can make it different. I love the work you're doing!
ReplyDeleteYou are a fantastic doula- speaking from experience.
ReplyDeleteLook at doulamatch.com (I think)
and I can try and get your name out as much as possible.
There may be a special niche for a doula who has been there done that with sections- and NICU- multiples. all of which are circumstances when a mom needs ever bit of understanding available- which you have- that is an amazing blessing.
What happened in the past happened in the past. Speaking as a mom who formula fed her first and had a very interventive first birth- education is key- knowledge and trust in our bodies is key.
Thank you so much for attending meghan's arrival
I don't even know you personally, but I know I would love to have you for a doula and I would recommend you to other women in a heartbeat. Your unique experiences bring a wisdom few doulas possess. Carry on! You're doing a great work!
ReplyDelete